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Well, 460.63 miles gave me a lot of time to think. And thinking is dangerous...

You know how they say "if you can't get someone out of your head, you shouldn't give up on them?" Well, I'm here to say that I think that is bullshit. Maybe it's my cynical nature, but I'm from the "if you truely care about someone, you'll let them go" camp. And that's where I'm at. Sorta. Heh...or maybe I'm just trying to kid myself into not caring again...because if I don't care the end result won't matter. I just don't understand why I can't just get some things out of my head. Maybe because I'm letting myself get my hopes up.

All the amazing people I've gotten the chance to know in Illinois. Michelle, Kris, Blake, all the drama people and all their friends...the list keeps getting bigger. Also, how fortunate I am that Sean and I broke up. If it wasn't for that, almost none of these people would have gotten to impact my life in such a positive manner. Sure, I've lost a couple people because of it, but when I really think about it, none of those people were my friends. They were people I hung out with and did things with because that's who Sean hung out with and did things with. So really, I didn't lose anything and gained a ton.

How strange it is that I never got really really upset about breaking up with Sean. Maybe it was because we had been breaking up since July. I had three months of preparing for the "final blow." Maybe it was because I knew that we weren't good for each other and it was more relief than anything else. I really don't know. I just know that I'm so much happier now. Even with all the stress and the uncertainity and the being alone, I'm happier. And that's key.

So yeah...I made it back up to the good ole E.R. without too much trouble. I got excited and made too quick an exit off the road in Bloomington, but that was only a 15 minutes detour. Then between Stevens Point and Wausau the road was blockaded with police everywhere. Looked like a bomb went off...literally. The semi in front of me stopped and talked with the officer that was there for a good ten mintues...so I just followed him around all these backroads and eventually ended up back on the highway...probably another 15 mintue detour. But...I'm in one piece and here for a little over a week. Uggggg.

Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
ackermanman52
Jan. 6th, 2008 08:04 am (UTC)
I wish I had your mindset right now. Maybe one day I'll be able to say that I know exactly how you feel. :(
theater_chica
Jan. 7th, 2008 06:49 pm (UTC)
Which part of it?

Also...I wouldn't wish for my mindset. It changes on a daily basis and drives me nuts sometimes.
ackermanman52
Jan. 8th, 2008 12:00 am (UTC)
I was referring to your comment about if you love someone you'll let them go. I've started to let go, but it's taken a while and it's not easy for me. That's what I mean. Sorry.
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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