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Oscars Amanda...

Otherwise Known As...

Get the Koala that's in my bush eating Laura's rabbit stew that Jessica spit in out of here!!!!

I appoligize for the lenght and meaninglessness of this in advance...

Wow...what a strange turn of events. Well not really. What a weird way to end an absolutely terrible day is more like it.

Stephen has come through again! Provided the icing on the cake of a crappy day. *score on for me Stephen* So I sits down at me computer...and who should pop online but good ole "S"...so I start chatting. Basically the opening line of "my day sucked how are you?" Of course this leads to...

Stephen: Why did your day suck.
Amanda: To put it simply I was dumped. *sidenote...I know this isn't exactly fair since he DID say that he felt "bad" about stuff but "good" too..and well it's just confusing...but for simplicity's sake I've decided to refer to it as being dumped*
Stephen: Well you said you saw it coming awhile ago didn't you?
Amanda: Well yes, but I didn't think it would be today.
Stephen: Well do you want me to call you?
Amanda: Uh...I'm online with dial up now. All you'd get is callwave...

Okay...so more conversation...Stephen eventually calls. He tells me...

Stephen: Well I'm sorry to hear about when happened but I had a good day today.
Amanda: Really? That's cool. What happened.
Stephen: This probably isn't the best time to tell you this but. Well ya see, in high school there was this one girl...
Amanda: Awwwww...Stephen met a girl.
Stephen: No I didn't meet a girl.

Stephen now proceeds to tell me about "Laura" *Stephen will understand the quotes...everyone else just ignore them.* this girl who was the girl of all girls in his eyes in high school and how low and behold "Laura" just happens to now work at the video store that he works at and also has like this wonderful education and wants everything out of life he wants and yadda yadda yadda. So I sit here with my blood boiling and plans of how to off this "Laura" chick and somehow this whole thing just strikes me funny. Maybe it was when Stephen kept saying how it won't last and I was like "she's the one" or whatever. I have no clue. But it struck me as hilerous. Then somehow we get on the topic of Jessica and spitting. *Jessica spits, Stephen finds this intreguing* So that ended up being a riot. So THEN while he's listing off every male he knows to set me up with *mind you he's in Maryland and I'm in Wisconsin* we get off on the topic of some cream with eccaliptus *I can't spell for shit* and Koala's coming out of his bush and well...before you know it "Laura" has rabbit stew Jessica is cooking and spitting in and God only knows what all...but I laughed my ass off.

Well the total kicker was me not being a violent person yet decided that I shall burn Jesse's house down just because I can and that not being violent if he's not in it...and well he just loses it. When he finally recovers this is all he said...

"I can just see the Minocqua volenteer fire department coming out and Jess running through them with a dalmation named sparky spitting the fire out."

I haven't laughed like I did tonight in years....

Thanks darling :P

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